Major!!! UGH!!!! WHAT A STINKER!!! WHAT A TURKEY!!!!!!!
We went to Target last night. Just him and I. The rest of them were at the ice rink skating...yes...you heard me right...SKATING...AGAIN!!!!! In their defense it was the end of the year party for the Squirts. Anyway...
So, I have Major in the cart....he is being fairly good. I am looking for Fiber for Cam....so I push the cart out of the middle of the aisle behind me while I kneel down to look at the Fiber. In the meantime, there is another mother and child that are in the aisle. I start hearing boxes flying off of the shelves onto the floor. I think to myself...."Gosh...what a brat...if that were my kid he would get a tongue lashing." Finally...they leave....but I keep hearing boxes flying off the shelves....what the...."MAJOR NO!!!!" I turn to see boxes littering the aisle and Major hucking them all over the place. Apparently I had him WAY to close to the shelves. UGH! That is just the beginning...it gets better.
So...after I clean up the floor we head out to look for chips for the boys' hockey party this weekend. I am in the chip aisle...it is fairly quiet....picture this:
Little old lady walking towards Goldfish. She picks up a bag of Goldfish and Major pierces the quiet with, "NO!!! MY GOLDFISH!" It startles me...so you can imagine how startled poor little old lady is! She throws the bag of goldfish....goldfish all over the floor. I apologize profusely all the while my son is STILL yelling, "NO!!! MY GOLDFISH...MY GOLDFISH!" I jokingly tell her, "He is very possesive of his goldfish"....she doesn't see the humor. People are staring, Maj is still yelling.....SCREW THE CHIPS...I AM GETTING OUTTA HERE! I start heading down the aisle...Maj is still yelling even though I am threatening him....I start to hear little old lady yelling something behind me....I think...."SHE IS CHASING ME....just ignore her Tonya...get out of here!" I start thinking of the little old New York lady from Madagascar 2 with her purse....I get more nervous. Yes....I am clearly afraid of this little old lady...she is STILL yelling something at me....I ignore it, I block out her words, as I turn the corner...I can't. Why can't I? Oh my gosh....THAT'S why little old lady was yelling at me...as we had started walking away, Major who is very possesive about goldfish, grabs the end of her cart and we are dragging her cart behind us....little old lady is too slow to catch up with us...hence the yelling....I had her cart and her purse dragging behind me with my possessive little boy holding on for dear life. After apologizing over and over again...I got out of there. That was enough shopping for one night!